Thursday, 14 June 2012

RIP Rosie Whitaker. I hardly knew you and I don't think you knew me at all, but you shouldn't have died. You shouldn't have been made to feel that way. It isn't fair. I hope you're happy, and you're in a better place. I hope that everything worked out for you in the end. I hope you feel better now. I hope no one else resorts to what you did. I hope you're okay. You are in my prayers.

Saturday, 21 January 2012


just some random stuff i drew the other day in physics. so sue me, i was drawing when i should have been learning. it's not my fault!!! i have this sucky teacher who was only supposed to be here for a term but then, yip-dee doo, she decided to stay on -_- but i was bored and it's not like i was learning anything from her anyway so....

Thursday, 19 January 2012

It's not that I want to kill myself, I just want to die.

I just wish I hadn't told her all those thing. I was so careful, trying to keep my emotions locked safely in my heart, and it worked for so long. Not thinking about the pain all those fake smiles were causing me, focusing on the people who glow in my world instead of the people who are dark shadows. But today I couldn't hold it in anymore, I couldn't stand it, I was fed up with no one giving a shit. I couldn't help the tears that came, and when she asked what was wrong, I thought maybe she was one of the people who glowed.
How wrong I was.
I told her why I was sad, well, I only told her a little bit of it, and she scorned my reasons. I know they're not much, but the fact is, I can't help the sadness I feel. It's not my fault that the little things affect me so bad.
If she was a real friend, she would've given me a shoulder to cry on. Instead, she told me to suck it up and move on.
And when she was gone, I only cried harder.

I guess the pain I feel is less than I deserve, though. All the mistakes I've made, all the tears I've caused.
I wish I could go back and take it all away. Make myself a better person.
It's a shame the reasons for that are selfish. It's only because if I could do that, I wouldn't hurt so much now. It's not because I'm a bitch, oh I can live with that, but I can't live with the pain.
It's funny how your 'friends' hurt you more than your 'enemies' ever could.
It's funny how you can forgive but never - EVER - forget. What they've done to me will always linger in my mind, at the back at the front, it will always be there. When I'm sad, when I'm happy.
Sometimes I think I'd be better off making friends with the people I hate.
People suck.
And I suck the most.
There are only two people left in my world who glow. Only two people left who I can talk to without wishing they would just leave me alone already. And I know that they can turn into shadows easy as, because one of them has done it before. She could easily do it again.
Funny how in September I had a good ten friends who I would kill, possibly even die for. Now I've got two.
Karma came to kick my arse and I don't like it.
I want out.
I'm Roman Catholic so maybe it's blasphemous to believe in reincarnation, but that's the only thing that helps me through some days.
I hold onto the hope that maybe my next life will be better than this.

Thursday, 5 January 2012

2012 babyyy!!

You have no idea how good it felt to post that last post (the thought of the day one) and see that it was from 2012!! Ah, it made me smile.
Tangled is the film of 2012! I just watched it on the plane back to England yesterday and it was damn well epic! When I first saw the trailers, I thought it would be some crap film, but it was amazing! It's my new favourite film! No joke, I've watched it twice in as many days! ^_^ And I adore the first song in the end credits, Something That I Want by Grace Potter. I kept going back to 8 minutes before the end so that I could listen to it.
Tangled is without a doubt epic.
Frying pans...who knew, right?

Oh no, oh no, oh no...this is very bad. So so bad! They just can't get my nose right!
Pascal!!!! I love you, Pascal! You are epic!

In short, Tangled is the film to watch. It is FUNNY! Something I definitely didn't expect. And it's so sweet when Rapunzel and Flynn are watching the lanterns :'). And the moment Gothel stabs Flynn, I felt a stirring of anger in my heart. >:( Get out of here, Gothel!

I love that film.

Thought of the Day

Just look up to the stars and believe who you are.

~ So Long, Goodbye - Sum 41

Wednesday, 21 December 2011

Problem solved.

If you're ill, you have two things to worry about.
You'll either get better, or get worse.
If you get better, problem solved. If you get worse, you have two things to worry about.
You'll get better, or you'll die.
If you get better, problem solved. If you die, you have two things to worry about.
If you get to Heaven or Hell.
If you get to Heaven, problem solved. If you get to Hell, you'll be too busy hugging all your friends to notice that there's a problem.
So ultimately, there is no problem.

Fairytales and Happy Endings

Sometimes you think everything in life is going to fall into place just fine.
In the past few years, I've learned it doesn't always work that way.
Don't get me wrong - some people do get their fairytale endings. But it just doesn't often work out as neat as that.
My nan used to tell me the way it ends isn't as important as making the story worthwhile. If it ends badly, tough luck. Just suck it up. But if you've made the story a story to be proud of, then the bad ending is worth it. I think that's quality advice, don't you? We're all going to end up dead, anyways. That's what life does, right? It puts you through all this different stuff, and then it kills you. And everyone leaves behind a story.
You might think your story is boring, stupid and no one would care, but trust me, when it gets published, someone is going to buy it. Someone will buy it, and they'll end up the biggest person in your life. And that's when you get your happy ending.
The happy ending isn't as important as the story, but the better the story, the happier the ending will be.
<3 someone will want to read your story over and over again, till they know it like the back of their hand. You just make sure to show as much interest in their story as they've shown in yours.